The process of healing may take a long time and part of it is self-growth but it will not always be simple, enjoyable, and rewarding. It certainly can be, but there is also another aspect of the self-growth journey. And that is, when everything falls apart.
One of the major parts of self-growth is learning how to look inside yourself and get clear about certain things. These are usually deep-rooted beliefs that we formed in childhood. These beliefs are usually what prevent us from living fully productive lives. The problem is that these deep-rooted beliefs are part of the foundation upon which our current lives are built. So dissolving them is an excellent idea.
That’s what happened to me this week. I had been struggling with since childhood. I finally felt totally clear on why it was there, and I understood exactly what I needed to do to dissolve it. So, I set about doing just that and then everything fell apart.
I spent a couple of days feeling shell-shocked. Finally, I understood what was happening, and I could see clearly how everything is interconnected. It was no accident that everything fell apart just when I was finally making progress on my inner blockages. They fell apart because I was making progress on my inner blockages.
As painful as it is, it’s a good thing, because my life circumstances were built on lies. The lies were the early beliefs I had formed about myself since childhood. Once I began changing those beliefs, my life circumstances began changing also. Change is good, but it can also be scary and painful as hell. It is necessary however, because in order to build something better, we need to tear down what already exists.
So, how do we deal with the pain and fear when everything falls apart? Our first reaction might be to run away to avoid feeling the pain. Another reaction might be to try and put everything back the way it was before it fell apart. But doing so only delays the process. Remember that the destruction is necessary in order to make room for the rebuilding of something better.
In order to complete the process, we need to stay with it. There will be pain and discomfort involved. There will be fear. There will be anger and grief. But there will also be an awakening deeper than any we have experienced before, and our eyes will be opened in powerful ways.
