Boundless Thoughts

Give them what they need not what they want. Too many children grow up getting all the things they want while little attention is given to what they really need.

Love them anyway. Most of us parents adore our children. Yet, some parents have a way of regularly communicating to their children that they do not measure up. Children need parents who will believe in them and no matter what will love them anyway.

Bless your children by giving them you. There is no substitute for your presence in their lives. Your regular, consistent, emotional and physical presence means so much. Being attentive and giving one-on-one time are priceless gifts to children.

Pray for your children. If you are not praying for them each day, who is? Regardless of the age, they need you to lift them up before the Lord in prayer each day. Think about their day. Think about their setting. Think about the people they will be with. Pray about these situations.

Take every opportunity to remind them of who they. They will, most likely, receive many false messages about their identity. They will be told that their worth is based upon their academic record, their physical attractiveness, their charm, their ability to make money, etc. Help them grow up with a sense of their real identity.

Be your child’s greatest encourager. Too many parents are really not that encouraging. Children are not mind readers. We can do better than just expecting them to know we are in their corner. They need to hear it. Make an effort to catch them doing something good, right, thoughtful, considerate, well done, etc. and point it out. Highlight it! “Hey, you really handled that situation very well.”

Give your children something to look forward to when they come home. Give them a beautiful home to look forward to. That’s home — not house. Homes that are filled with warmth, laughter, and love. These homes remind kids that no matter how bad the day is at school or with friends, they can alway come home.

Say only what communicates value, respect, and love. Never say or do anything that will humiliate your children. They need to know that homes are safe places where one’s mistakes are not announced to the world.

Deal with your issues. There are no perfect human beings. Yet, if you don’t deal with your own issues (your sins, your insecurities, your feelings of inadequacy, etc.), these can impact your children. They may end up having to deal with some of the very issues you would never grapple with.

A good parent is humble. Some parents don’t seem to learn from others. In fact, they seem to be bent on reinventing the wheel. Ask someone in whom you have confidence how you are doing. Ask if they have any concerns about your children in particular. Read something that will help you grow as a parent. Beware of being over-confident in your own wisdom.

A good parent understands that you either pay now or pay later. It is far easier to yell, threaten, or just ignore it. Remember, if you don’t deal with this at an early age, it only gets worse. Deal with it now and future years may be a real joy.

A good parent understands the importance of following through. Following through is important for a parent. When children disobey in some way, too many parents resort to endless talking, yelling, threatening, explaining, etc. The focus should be on consequences. As a result of this unexceptable behavior, what is the consequence? All too often, there is no consequence. Everyone gets upset. The parent threatens but there is no follow through. Nothing happens. I know this is difficult. I know it takes energy. But–following through is critical.

A good parent raises these children as if they weren’t hers. After all, they aren’t. They are on loan from God. As a parent, I am responsible for rearing them in a way that is pleasing to him. I am accountable to him for what I do with his children. My goal is to produce children who love God and ultimately desire to live in joyful obedience to him.

A good parent prays for his/her children. One of the greatest privileges I have as a parent is to pray for my children. If I’m not praying for my children, then who is? I pray for my children in both the “big and little” things of life. I pray for their protection against the evil one. Most of all, I pray that they might come to love God and treasure him above all else.

A good parent is gracious. Her children see the way their mom treats people. They witness graciousness in the way mom or dad relates to their friends. These children see graciousness in the way their parents relate to one another. Good parents understand that kids first learn about the grace of God not in theological explanations but in lives of their mom and dad.

A good parent builds an atmosphere of encouragement. A good parent communicates that she believes in her children. Regardless of their age, children need parents who are encouragers.

A good parent creates an atmosphere of joy and laughter at home. “Home” should be a place where we look forward to being at the end of the day. A good parents works to create a home that is a place of warmth, acceptance, and laughter.

A good parent realizes that one of the best gifts that he can offer his children is himself. Too many parents try to buy their way to their children’s hearts. I have received countless words of discouragements from my mom, whatsoever. Consequently, I felt as if she really didn’t know what was going on in my life not to mention my heart